I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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