Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
