I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
