so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
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