You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
