It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
