Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
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