I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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