VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
