Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
