yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Randomize