I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
