I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
