it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Randomize
