I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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