JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
How external is "for external use only"?
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
