honey bunches of taint.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize