I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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