Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Where are you guys?
Drunk
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
