quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize
