My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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