Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
