I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize