Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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