I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
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