You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
i came on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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