she told me i tasted like america
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
