we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
