Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Randomize
