We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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