Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
