Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
