you have to choose: penises or morals?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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