he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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