Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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