No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
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