We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
