that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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