Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
