If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Randomize
