just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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