There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
