it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
