so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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