So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
