i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
