We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
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