Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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