He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
