omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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