I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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