Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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